Hiding someones inhaler - again, NOT a prank. I'd be livid, and they would stay uninvited. I thought that's the person doing the work, just wasn't sure where he'd be working; sometimes my English just says bye haha, Mechanic is a good word! Stealing someone's effing inhaler out in the wilderness is trying to kill that person. (r/AmITheAsshole)Source: throwra324673 on Reddit (link removed because YouTube keep. NTA. I can't believe he is still there. Are you American? I agree. NTA They slashed his car tires, made him play chess (How does that even determine manly status the hell? We had a friend die from cancer, because he never went to the doctor for his yearly blood work and checkup. Anyone who isn't willing to own up like an adult can make other plans. But the question is if she's the AH for uninviting them to the wedding, so I guess she's off the hook for that. Bygones can't be bygones until the situation has been resolved. Your family is really toxic. NTA. Yeah i would have been off the fence after the tires. Also- are they actually sorry for what they did? They are nothing but bullies. The guy: Oh, did you put it in the right spot? Since he buys high quality tires, that'd have been an immediate vandalism report. He said its not fair she gets everyone and he gets no one. acts against the man you claim to love. That wasnt a prank. For the people telling OP that shes TA for not cutting off sooner, please understand that for most people that grow up in this type of environment we become slightly apathetic to it and make excuses cause we think its NORMAL. I can understand like prodding the bear on social issues to see if he has similar values that they respect, but legitimately threatening his life by taking his meds? Once upon a time I went to Vegas with my boyfriend and I thought it would be hilarious to tell all of my friends that I got married while I was there. What they are doing is expensive (slashing his tires?) tell your bf to call the cops and get them arrested for the tire slashing. ESH. They could have killed him . My guess is the OP and her mother have had this done to them all their life because the dad is most likely an abuser. Pranks aren't supposed to cost the person being pranked money. His worth js as a humannot reliant on their approval or testing. It's been five years since I realized what was going on, and only one sibling has come to the same conclusion since then. Sorry youre going through this OP. What are the odds Timmy the Collegiate Asthmatic makes twice as much money as all of the REAL MEN put together Then I am so glad that OP isn't one of the women who "marry their father". Its toxic. These are no pranks, this is bullying. Feeling like your body is not getting enough oxygen is a scary ass experience, one that I would never wish on anyone. OP why do you let your family treat him like that? They also tested his fishing and hunting skills, overwhelmed him with hypothetical scenarios to test his decision making abilities/mental strength. Thats a lifesaving (in some cases) medication. Imagine if you guys decided to have kids and they acted this way around them too? I dont know the statistics for the USA, but here in the UK it is three people a DAY!! NTA. I mentioned this in another comment below but I had to get all my tires replaced last October right before I went on vacation and that cost ran over 600. Send them all links for information about consequences of their behaviour regarding his inhaler. And they think they are adults. They're the ones that have broken the trust. Screw the wedding, you should never speak to these people again. Side note!!! NTA. Considering that the four closest male relations in her life are all awful people, I think OP's failings are purely because her frame of reference was established at an awful angle by childhood. Your family is fked up and ruined any real relationship themselves. Its fucking property damage! So much this. they are very incompatible when it comes to family matters. SSDGM. Jesus. Oh my days, what a mess. Bye . Being in a good mood I went on a websearch to add some examples of that having happened. So according to your family, I (a woman) am a man cause I can fix tires, cause obviously that's a manly man thing and not just a question of interests and acquired skills? For a joke that isn't even funny. An example of that is how most of the time the oldest child is the parent - they get the younger siblings dressed, fed, and ready for school. This would have been a dealbreaker for me. Send them this article. Her husband is the same.". Because if she has an asthma attack and is more than 3 feet from one, she will die. Keep asking why. The Testing they have done is all about highlighting there own sense of entitlement over who they find acceptable to for you to be with and driving away someone they find unacceptable. He sounds pathetic. Shrug and say that was your family? They were a collective bag of dicks. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Privacy Policy. It's a crime. For some reason the other guys never prank me. I remember when I was a child- the feeling of pure panic when I couldnt breathe, trying to gasp for air but everytime I took even a shallow breath in it triggered a coughing fit. And they just showed you they've no idea where the line between pranks and fatal consequences is. Would they still fuck with him if there was a chance hed pound them into the ground like a fence post? They are BULLIES, OP. Hell, you might be the asshole if you don't press charges. "Garage" or "Auto Shop" work well too, but can be a bit ambiguous depending on context, as garage also means where you park your car in North America, whether it's at your house or the larger undergroud lots. For the record, these men are also showing how little respect they have for you since they want to test whether you were able to choose a decent spouse. He could press charges for that. We know our own families and how to handle them already, so it just makes sense. Slashing tires and hiding inhalers are not harmless goofs. That's a crazy amount of money. I still don't always know for sure with some stuff, because I've come across too many crazies who really do believe things like allergies/asthma/mental disorders/autism/invisible disabilities are all fake or "excuses". Tim is your family, and family stands up for each other and help them with a tire change, not slash them. It should've been stopped long before this. Your cousi, brother, uncle and dad are TA for what they have done. Tell your fianc to stop doing things alone with them. Try to embarrass, or challenge his authority in front of them? Strength is setting boundaries, power is enforcing those boundaries. But anyway once you said yes she should have felt morally obliged to go with you. He couldve literally died for a prank. Not ok. Also this went way too far. Of course not, bullies are inherently cowards. Also, asthma attacks can be deadly. This is definitely your hill to die on. Theyd find a way to ruin it and expect you to laugh about it. NTA. Also think of the future. Get away from your family, theyre even bigger assholes. Itll suck, but sounds like theyre quite toxic and you have the awareness to recognize it. The last question is to judge whether you will have latent feelings of guilt should you not attempt to reconcile with your dad, and then not have the opportunity later to do so. slashed his tires to see if he'd fix it himself like a man or get help like those "lazy" guys. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. less likely to seek out mental healthcare, source: 40+ years of experience at the sharp end, and a couple of dozen responses to "Help! You're lucky Tim is tje guy he is. I cant wait for the AITA because I did not stand up to the bullies in the family and now my husband is divorcing me. I'm so sorry you went through that." ~ bdm90. She sounds like shes been seething. What kind of fiance would you be if you didn't stand up for him? This, Im shocked they are engaged, he must really love her. Honestly we should make a sister sub for AITA. This has to be fake. The fact youre questioning if youre the asshole in this scenario is concerning. I bet the pranksters are anti-vaxxers too. Can you imagine what other "pranks" they would play at the wedding? Your family is driving the wedge between you. Welcome to the end times. Tbf I think she didn't know until it happened .. the men side of OP's family seem very toxic and misogynistic as well.. they probably won't include a "woman" in their plans Yeah. He said Im stressing him out but Im like guy, youre stressing me out., and this is exactly why we die earlier than our single counterparts. Putting frogs in people's beds isn't cool either, if someone came on here and said their family kept leaving frogs in their fiance's bed no one would say, "haha good one, tell your fiance to quit freaking out over such a funny joke.". After that she got really jealous of my relationship with my. Slashing tires costs money and time and possibly work. NTA, in my opinion you're getting a pretty good deal, cutting one toxic member of your family out and a few enablers are going with them. "We just wanted to see if he would be able to save himself with no brakes, because if he can't he clearly isn't a manly man like us". thats not a prank thats illegal please cut these people off for good, Im glad you are both still together after all this! Hiding his medication as a prank is the lowest of the low. If you dont do something, youre going to lose him. I admittedly have had a few fights with my dad about how I think she treats me and my brother and sister. I grew up with a very messed up family. For no reason. You are NTA for sticking up for your fiance, but you will be if you let them into your wedding and don't go low/no contact. But Tim is a Saint he has put up with that bullying. That kind of behavior is toxic and pervasive. It really fucking is. People can die from asthma attacks, especially if they dont have access to their inhalers. Also, are they the kind of people who can sit down and shut up? Having a chronic condition doesn't make you less of a man. Fast forward to my graduation. OP is NTA for what she is asking about, but how on earth was the tire stunt not the line drawn in the sand? I think the inhaler thing was just the last straw. People die from asthma. And maybe, just maybe your dad and other family members involved will get some personal growth out of this and grow up to be a proper men. Um, hey. They already didn't respect op fiance and are the huge asshole but why asking him to go on a trip with them when they show multiple time how awful they are. It absolutely doesn't ruin any joke I've ever come across to use a /s. And then expect better from family. At my graduation, she and my stepdad bought me a Honda Accord. NTA, but if were your fianc I would not marry into your family. (jfc the warped mentality has me spinning). NTA. So you definitely made the right decision. I'd protect him & any future kids you have with everything you have in you. Would these men abuse him for being too soft? 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